Folding, spindeling, and mutilating lauguage for fun since Aug, 2004
Thursday, August 31, 2006

I find myself with an extra half hour before I have to go to Plymouth (Minnesota) and pick up our God-daughter.

 

It seems like not really enough time to get into the task of gathering my thoughts on Thomas Paine’s essay “Agrarian Justice”…which I will eventually be inflicting upon you when I get a chance.

 

Rocky wants to take someone to the State Fair.  He is taking me to the State Fair to see Garrison Keillor on Friday.  That’s where I draw the line.  One short evening and I’m done.  So he is going to take our God-daughter this afternoon.

 

To me, the state fair experience boils down to a full spectrum sensory assault that includes getting bounced off the shoulders of several thousand smelly, greasy, sweaty Minnesotans who have been eating fried food off of sticks and washing it down with beer (I don’t think they have found a way to do fried beer on a stick yet) in the August heat for several hours straight…and then leaving with a migraine.

 

The State Fair, for me, is an exercise in refraining from a long string of impulses to commit deep-fried aggravated assault on a stick.

 

I assume that the dulcet tones of Garrison Keillor will ameliorate the effect the fair has on me.  I’ll let you know.

 

Over the years, our God-daughter (Panda Girl) has evolved into Rocky’s perfect State Fair companion.  Which is lucky for everyone.  Our God-daughter is my friend Sue’s daughter.  Sue reacts to the State Fair much the way I do.  Anyway, I bet these two birds-of-a-feather will have a great time.  And Sue won’t have to watch her daughter eat deep-fried pumpkin pie or a deep-fried Twinkie, or a deep-fried Snickers Bar…or whatever.

 

But while we wait for Rocky to finish work, Panda Girl and I will spend some quality girl-time together.  Don’t know what we’ll do, as I recently spent an afternoon of manicure/pedicure-type behavior with my niece, and my nails still look fine.  I think.  I still haven’t figured out how to judge when the nail polish is supposed to come off.  When the very first flaw appears?  After the first noticeable chip?  When more nail is exposed than covered?  So many questions.

 

Perhaps shopping.  Girls like shopping, right?  We do need groceries.  I suppose a trip to the archery range is not quite girly enough.  Anyway, I’ll think of something.

 

But while you wait for my laser-tight and ground-breaking modern interpretation of the concepts in Thomas Paine’s Agrarian Justice, why don’t you pop over and take a look at Conrad Zero’s take on self-check-out lanes.  Make sure you download and fill out the form he provides.

Thursday, August 31, 2006 6:32:57 AM (Central Standard Time, UTC-06:00) | Comments [2] | #
Wednesday, August 30, 2006

Hey you guys!  It's an honest to FSM miracle!  The image His Sublime Noodeliness has appeared in the sky!  It is clearly a sign of his blessings on our country!  Or his judgement!  or maybe he just showed up to watch Fight Science on the National Geographic channel (which was freaking entertaining, so who can blame him?  I WANT a crash-test dummy.  Rocky, buy me a crash test dummy, PLEASE?!?) ...whatever.  It's a miracle!

Go see it for yourself!

http://3dpancakes.typepad.com/ernie/2006/08/who_is_that.html#comments

I'm considering a pilgrimage.

Wednesday, August 30, 2006 6:33:26 AM (Central Standard Time, UTC-06:00) | Comments [5] |  |  |  | #
And a sophomoric storm analogy.
Wednesday, August 30, 2006 5:51:11 AM (Central Standard Time, UTC-06:00) | Comments [0] |  |  | #
Tuesday, August 29, 2006
I'm just saying, this is the picture I get from where I'm sitting. I'd be glad to hear what anyone else sees.
Tuesday, August 29, 2006 9:05:55 AM (Central Standard Time, UTC-06:00) | Comments [2] |  | #
Monday, August 21, 2006
Apparently, we need more of them.
Monday, August 21, 2006 7:08:03 AM (Central Standard Time, UTC-06:00) | Comments [2] |  | #
Sunday, August 20, 2006

In case anyone is wondering where I’ve been for the last week, I was in International Falls with the family.  There was a music festival thing there, with string players from several different states/provinces of the U.S. and Canada.

 

Grasshopper and I had a great time playing the music.  Grasshopper enjoyed playing the theme from Superman the most, I think.

 

We rehearsed and practiced daily and spent the rest of the time swimming, biking, canoeing and fishing.

 

Oh yeah, and hanging out with my parents, my sister, and my nephew.

 

That is always a mixed bag of experience.  My dad likes to push people’s buttons.  My mom frequently says things that are subtly critical without being directly so.  My sister often takes things personally that just weren’t meant to be.  I tend to see all sides of the situation and feel responsible for fixing everything and making everyone get along.

 

So my dad will do something that he knows drives my mom crazy.  My mom will make some generally judgmental statement about “people who do such-and-such”, which my sister takes to actually be a comment critical of her, and so she snaps at my mother, who takes her to task for being so hyper-sensitive…

 

…which is dad’s cue to pop in with a well-placed comment that is guaranteed to set someone off, which gets everyone sniping anew.

 

Eventually, my sister will storm out and take a walk and smoke until she is calmed down.  While she’s gone, my mom makes comments about how my sister is way too sensitive and high strung, and is unreasonable in taking everything too personally.  If I stay there, I can hear my mom’s comments.  If I walk with my sister, I can hear her talk about how mom is so relentlessly critical, and how when we were kids, we could never do anything right.

 

They are both right, and they are both wrong.  At any point, each of them has the ability to just say “No, I’m not going to say/do those things that cause me to hurt the other person and start this whole mess.”  But they don’t.

 

Meanwhile my stomach churns and I clamp down a little harder on my jaw and reflect on why exactly it was I left home early.  (Although I would like to pretend I don’t fall into old patterns, don’t be fooled.  But it IS my blog, and I don’t have to reveal my petty, Pavlovian-reaction co-dependant behaviors if I don’t want to.  So Nyah.)

 

I like it when we have our instruments out and just play.  Grasshopper was a sunny delight at rehearsals, and got many compliments on his playing, his attitude, and his sparkling enthusiasm.  He also got recognition for a HUGE 28 inch Northern Pike that he hooked, played to the boat and landed all on his own.  The director of the orchestra was staying in a cabin near my parent’s cabin, and saw the monster…so she announced it at rehearsal.

Adventure Boy did a great job entertaining and babysitting my nephew, and generally making sure the little kids were safe in the water.  Rocky took the kids fishing, did a lot of shuttling people and instruments around, and generally made everything easier and more fun for everyone.

 

I did a little running, but it was COLD.  Got down to fifty degrees.  It is weird to go running early in the morning in mid August and see your breath in the air.  Not good.  Muscles-cold-crampy-badness all around.  But hey, I got out there and did it.  And that is always good.

 

Then we came home and I was in a wedding.  Matron of honor for my friends Falina and Aaron.  It was a super sweet ceremony at William O'Brian State Park.  Very cool.  Perfect day.  And after seeing the family interactions there, I didn't feel quite so bad about my own family.  We all got 'em, we all love 'em, and we all gotta get a certain distance from 'em in order to be our best selves...but for better or for worse, we wouldn't be who we are without 'em.

Sunday, August 20, 2006 11:55:05 PM (Central Standard Time, UTC-06:00) | Comments [2] | #
Thursday, August 10, 2006

“What are you implying Jon?  That O’Reilly and Geraldo are narcissists enthralled with their own overblown egos?  Projecting their own petty insecurities onto the world around them?  Inventing false enemies for the sole purpose of bolstering their sense of self-importance; itty bitty Nixons minus the relevance or a hint of vision?  How DARE you.”

 

-          Stephan Colbert

“The Daily Show with Jon Stewart.

Thursday, August 10, 2006 10:33:42 PM (Central Standard Time, UTC-06:00) | Comments [0] |  | #

Here's a link to a story defending the right of an employer to dictate an employee's sexual behavior in her own home.

As much as I am comitted to religious freedom, I am beginning to see the point that we would be better off without these people and their poisonous ideas.  I realize that this is a little-known regressivist e-rag...but the fact remains that a woman was ordered by her employer to get married to her live in boyfriend, leave him, or quite her job.

AND, IT WENT TO COURT.

AND there are people who feel the court should have upheld the employer and not the wronged employee.

These people are enemies of the right of conscience, the right to free thought, the right to personal freedom of every kind.  They are enemies to your right to live on your own terms as a human being.

They have the right to believe whatever they want to believe, but no matter what they believe, that right ends when their beliefs infringe on the rights of others to live as they choose, according to their conscience.

UPDATE: There are seven states with anti-cohabitation laws: Florida, Michigan, Mississippi, North Carolina, North Dakota, Virginia, and West Virginia.  So, if you want to live together with someone and you aren't married to them, don't do it in any of these states.

Thursday, August 10, 2006 4:13:15 PM (Central Standard Time, UTC-06:00) | Comments [4] |  |  | #
Wednesday, August 09, 2006
Stone Soup Films: Real Movies Made by Real People
Wednesday, August 09, 2006 2:10:31 PM (Central Standard Time, UTC-06:00) | Comments [2] |  | #
Tuesday, August 08, 2006
Both sides squick me out.
Tuesday, August 08, 2006 12:48:00 PM (Central Standard Time, UTC-06:00) | Comments [4] |  |  |  | #
Sunday, August 06, 2006
At least, more than I used to be able to...
Sunday, August 06, 2006 10:07:58 PM (Central Standard Time, UTC-06:00) | Comments [0] | #
Saturday, August 05, 2006

What is wrong with you people? I’m talking to YOU, you people who got to my blog through the following searches:

 

“sims 2 how to make whoopee?”

 

And

 

“Alcoholic chaos confusion”

 

Also: the two of you people who came to my blog searching for “Wilfred Brimley”?  You frighten me.

 

Almost as much as the people who get here via the search term “wookie scrota

 

Really...who goes to log on to the internet, and goes to the trouble to bring up Google, and types in "Wilfred Brimley"?

 

What, in the name of all that it holy or even just plain innocent, is wrong with you people? (I ask again, because it bears repeating).

 

I’d like to fickin’ know.

 

BTW…the copious quantities of Margaritas previously mentioned? 

 

Underestimated.

 

That is all.  Goodnight.

Saturday, August 05, 2006 10:11:49 PM (Central Standard Time, UTC-06:00) | Comments [0] |  |  |  | #
Last installment. I promise. Unless something remarkable happens.
Saturday, August 05, 2006 11:07:24 AM (Central Standard Time, UTC-06:00) | Comments [0] |  |  | #
Friday, August 04, 2006
Dream a little dream. A little full-on tehnicolor surroundsound lucid dream.
Friday, August 04, 2006 10:48:52 PM (Central Standard Time, UTC-06:00) | Comments [0] |  | #
Active meditation: don't sweat the small stuff.
Friday, August 04, 2006 8:55:23 AM (Central Standard Time, UTC-06:00) | Comments [0] |  |  | #
Thursday, August 03, 2006
Or, "yep, let's break open that can of worms"
Thursday, August 03, 2006 10:07:06 PM (Central Standard Time, UTC-06:00) | Comments [0] |  |  | #
 
Today is a running day...haven't made it out yet...will probably go tonight after Kung Fu.
 
Tuesday SUCKED.  77 degrees SHOULD have felt cool, but the humidity was such that apparently human body temperature was below the dew point.  Between the condensation, sweat, and drizzle, I was soaked.  Like coming out of showering in your clothes, but without the freshness.  ugh.  Plus, I made it almost all the way around Staring Lake, and decided to take the ski-trail to add on a little distance.  When the ski trail rejoined the bike path, I took the wrong turn, and went back the way I had come, so my 3-mile run turned out to be somewhere around five miles.
 
It was like running five miles in a tepid steam room five miles long, with people spitting on you the whole way.
 
Except that analogy doesn't really encompass the mosquitos that came out in clouds whenever the drizzle let up.
 
The one good thing was that I'd taken the kids to the pool, so when I got back, I got to stretch out in hot, humid air...which made for a very effective stretch.  NO soreness.
Thursday, August 03, 2006 3:28:29 PM (Central Standard Time, UTC-06:00) | Comments [0] |  | #
Tuesday, August 01, 2006
Boys and their toys.
Tuesday, August 01, 2006 12:06:18 PM (Central Standard Time, UTC-06:00) | Comments [0] |  | #
False advertizing!
Tuesday, August 01, 2006 8:40:35 AM (Central Standard Time, UTC-06:00) | Comments [3] | #
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