Folding, spindeling, and mutilating lauguage for fun since Aug, 2004
Wednesday, 08 November 2006

1) Ration it.  You don't get a treat EVERY time you pee.  Sometimes the human is looking the other way.  Sometimes there is more than one human, and you find out that the human you are performing for isn't the one with the treats.  Sometimes they just decide to be assholes and give you a pat on the head and praise instead of a treat.  Peeing more often increases the chance that you will get rewarded.

2) Think it through first.  At first blush, racing up the stairs with the sock of your teenaged master in your mouth might seem like a good idea.  But it is rife with complications, such as the fact that the socks of a kid with size thirteen feet are longer than your actual body, and can get tangled in your feet and cause trippage.  You probably won't get hurt, but you will never recover your dignity.

3) Leaf piles are proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.

 

Wednesday, 08 November 2006 15:15:49 (Central Standard Time, UTC-06:00) | Comments [1] | #
Search
Archive
Links
Categories
Admin Login
Sign In
Blogroll
Themes
Pick a theme: