Folding, spindeling, and mutilating lauguage for fun since Aug, 2004
Wednesday, 09 August 2006

As some of you know, I am in a film group.  We make films.  They are usually short, silly, and occasionally dramatic.  They are all the very best film that we could make at the time. 

 

We (and by “we” I mean almost everyone involved with the project except for me and some extras) just finished up post-production of our first feature-length film.

 

I actually haven’t had anything to do with the film for quite some time, there being nobody who needed hittin’, no heavy camera dollys that needed totin’, and no inebriated Airborn Rangers who needed flirtin’ with in the post-production process (long story.  We needed something to keep his attention away from his growing pile of empty beer bottles).

Well, that feature length film has apparently gained distribution.  When I find out how you can go about purchasing it, I will let you know.  See, up to this point, our budget has been based on what a middle-class suburban family with two kids can spare.  In other words, Avindair and Spousalgoddess broke open the spare change jar and dug under the couch cushions, and we went wild.

 

I’m guessing that distribution of this film could mean some seed money for future projects.  And that would mean, frankly, better projects.

 

But, in preparation for said promotion, I’d like to offer you a few teasers for free:

 


Steve the Vampire

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=8986573989968129255

 

Originally conceived to answer the question “can we really do this?”  This is the first in a series of three vampire movies featuring the Vampire Hunter, Cassie Banning.

 

Steve the Vampire was made by a handful of people with no professional equipment, no experience, and no idea what they were doing.  They also didn’t have me as their fight choreographer, the poor bastards.

 

Much of the lighting was handled by two pre-teen children with flashlights.

 

The result was one of the most popular offerings of the Public Access channel in Savage, Minnesota for several months running. 


The Thing That Happened

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=2417304037882230904

Our second film.  Still our funniest -- and shortest -- piece.  Directed by an ex-member, and co-starring another ex-member.

 

It is a spoof of pretentious “Art” flicks.

 

It features our first film with Magic_Marmot doing the lighting.

 

I did Kraft Services for this film (brought ingredients and set up a Taco bar for cast and crew), and Catering (I made sure the coffee was steamy for the shots where it was of artistic importance that the coffee steam visibly.)  I also appear as a piece of set dressing (reflected in a window holding a sword), and I am part of a mob that beats the crap out of the writer/director at the end.

Pray for Daylight: Hunter

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-5520243947172601129

 

The fourth Stone Soup Film, and the second installment in the Cassie Banning story line.

Much bigger cast for this effort, much bigger crew.  You’ll see a couple of new faces in this one, and they are fantastic.  I did the fight choreography for this film, as well as for the next installment:  Pray for Daylight.  (Which is the film soon to be distributed).  You can watch the trailer for that film here:

Pray for Daylight Feature Trailer

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-2766270342322118914

 

So go ahead!  Pop some popcorn.  Revisit the films, rate them, even comment! You'll be glad you did.  Or maybe you won't.  Either way, at least then you'll know.

 

But wait a minute, you ask, what happened to your third film?  You jumped right from the second to the fourth!!!  How come you’re not pimping the third film?

 

That is a good question, with a complicated answer.  The main reason is that it is very politically incorrect.  It portrays two misogynistic male characters, one of which is afraid of women, and the other one fancies himself a “lady-killer” giving his friend sure-fire advice on how to “score”…and assuring him at every turn that there are women “checking him out”.  The joke of the movie turns on the viewer realizing (only at the end) that it is taking place in a lesbian bar.  This makes most of the viewing public uncomfortable and uncertain if they should laugh or not.

 

As an aside, I’ve shown this film to at least half a dozen lesbians, and THEY think it’s hysterical.  Although one of them asked me (who was playing one of the bar patrons) “How come you are the only butch in the bar?”  Which I don’t think is funny at all.

 

Add to this that our location wasn’t ideal, and it just asks the viewer to walk a little too far for the pay-off.

Wednesday, 09 August 2006 14:10:31 (Central Standard Time, UTC-06:00) | Comments [2] |  | #
Search
Archive
Links
Categories
Admin Login
Sign In
Blogroll
Themes
Pick a theme: